SBURB Zeta (Closed... for now)

==> Return to Dick.

You stare unflinching as your own father becomes trapped amidst the rubble. In truth your'e more concerned about the files and busts you had been working. Your most prized busts lay hidden within the deep abyss of father's bunker, safe from Penn's greasy fingers. Father will be ok, the rubble is just barely enough to stop him. you view the clock on the furnace... 2:10. You don't have enough time!

[S] Resurrect



You throw the trolls head into the kernelsprite, you can feel time itself seem to slow as the lobbed head makes its way into the mass of energy. The exact moment it touches, you along with most of the items in your room are pushed back. You stay on your feet due to your stature. However the rubble seems to have blown off your father. He gets up as if nothing happened and stares at what you've just done. He looks over to you and holds out his fists, only to simultaneously snap both the fingers on his hands into akimbo finger pistols. It seems as if he was testing you. You look over at the glowing red lights of the sprite he spins about ecstatically you have just created

POPPISPRITE

"Haha?! You did it...?! Uh whats your name again?! Doesn't Matter?! I know the plan?!"

He suddenly vanishes to the exterior of your house where above in the sky a meteor could just barely be seen. Slowly, the meteor seemed to freeze in mid air. A red cog seemed to form around it with a timer displaying 6:10. The same timer on the item in your house seemed to rewind along with this. Poppisprite flew back into Dick's home and loudly continued to question.

"What now?!"

"I need to find you something that can allow you to teleport across any distance, luckly I know just the thing. Penn, if you can hear me get Mona to place down your three starter items. I'll be sending help as fast as I can."

Dick glanced about the thrown about busts and documents in search of his magnum opus. After searching some time amidst the rubble, Father tapped you on your shoulder and removed a disk from the interior of his coat. It was your second favorite video game, SLENDER, THE ARRIVAL. You take it from his hands and stalk him momentarily as he quickly leaves the room, probably to go secure his bunker again.  

"Is that what your'e going to throw into me?! What will it do?!"

"Hah, you'll figure it out... pal."

Dick removes the disk from its case and throws it like a Frisbee into the floating head of Poppisprite. As lights flashed again you hoped to yourself that you aren't accidentally spiriting a CD instead of The Observer himself. Luckily, it doesn't as the lights fade away an incredibly tall figure stands before you, similar to the original Poppisprite only without a face and wearing a fancy black vest and white undershirt. You have just created...

POPPISLENDERSPRITE

... That's hard to say, let's just call him PSS for now.



"HnhnhnahahahnahehahhahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!!!!"

You laugh manically just like you've always wanted to. You've created a masterpiece, a resurrection of your god. This isn't the first time you've tried to resurrect something, throughout your life you've bred a wide variety of deformed Homonculi in the depths of Father's bunker. However, none have compared to this. PSS is your own personal guard, screw the consequences of you're actions... you deserve this!

"How does it feel... to be a god Pappiko."

"...?!"

"Pappiko?"

"...?!"

"Can you not speak? Are you overcome by darkness and wish to kill me now?"

"Where... the fuck... IS MY FACE???!!! WHAT THE FUCK HOW CAN I EVEN SEE WITHOUT EYES???!!!"

"Ah, that's a relief... It seems you're pacifistic personality was enough to hold back the inner desire to murder children. Tell me, are you feeling any unnatural urges?"

"GET IT OUT???!!! GET OUT OUT OF ME OH GOG???!!!
ALL THE GRUBS?! THEIR BODIES?! TORN TO SHREDS???!!!"

"That's good to know, do you think you can teleport to Mona and Penn's homes, they are in grave danger."

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA?!"

And with that, he was gone. The abomination of two opposite minds forced into one body really takes a toll on some. Luckily for Dick and the others, it seemed that PSS had enough of the second S in him to obey Dick's command. Instantaneously, the sprite reappeared directly behind Penn, screaming like a madman as it tried to suppress the urge to impale Penn on a tree branch.

"MOVE OH FUCK IT HURTS???!!!"

==> Where the FUCK has Mona been?

You watch in confusion as Penn fusses over his computer, squinting at the screen while trying to get a look at his.. It is only then that you realize that you can interact with stuff, due to the fact that there is an absolute clusterfuck on his pixelated monitor. You blink a few times as you examine the options on your screen. Oh, fuck. Starter items and whatnot.. What the fuck were those? Panicked, you decide to just throw down three fancy lookin' machines around Penn.. Only partially crowding the room. Why didn't you have any of these plopped down yet?

==>

As you continue to look at the options, you notice that you have plenty of something called "build grist." You didn't want to waste it all right away, but maybe there was more you needed to do..? Oh lord, this wasn't fun already. You're too dumb to know what to do! Quick, consult the wisest kid you know, who you were already talking to!

==>

Pesterlog

Spoiler:

==>

You look away from your screen for a moment at your crowded room.. Dick said you were supposed to prototype something. That only made you even more concerned about not knowing what to do! In these trying times, you decide to grab one of your childhood friends that just so happened to be a stuffed animal and not in any way at all sentient, DOTTIE.

.. It seems that your trusty companion has already found its way to your side, as per usual like any NON-SENTIENT stuffed bear would! You pull it into your lap for that bit of extra courage before you look back to your screen, which just so happened to be focused on Penn and..

What the fuck was that? That.. Did not look healthy.

==>

You are again PENN. After having finished the small chat with MONA, you sit in silence for a hot minute and forget to truly pay attention to the screen holding the clusterfuck of nonsense going on with DICK. Instead, you have good ol' UTube up with the usual bullshit filling your subscription box playing. It was about you caught up on this stuff anyways.

==>

With one last swig, you finish the can of sprite easily. -But something was missing. A fucking masterpiece was about to be created here. As if the spirits of B-Ball had entered your body, using it as a vessel for the slamming jams to come, you prepare to toss that fucker for a three pointer into the box on the stairs. This is it, man.

We're making this HAPEN.

==>

Luck was a worthless thing now. The only hope he could get from this world was divine intervention. For surely only a being that surpassed human comprehension would be capable of stopping the absolutely heinous shit that was about to happen in the confines of this bedroom. The can slams into the wall, rolling onto the step below and staying there....laying dormant.

Thank GOD noone saw that. -Hopefully Mona didn't...

==>

After experiencing shame for missing the shot, you attempt to move over to check the SBURB screen only to flinch at the three large objects consuming your room. It's barely enough to squeeze through at this rate! You turn back to immediately smacktalk your friend into rectifying this.


Pesterlog

Spoiler:

Fuckin' dunce-cap. You move through the maze-like interior and can't help but feel a little peeved. Mona knew damn well what they were doing here. This was to get back at you for bullying them earlier today! -Like you wouldn't notice...hmph.

==>

Upon getting up to the tubey thing, you decide to try the sensible thing and just...turn the valve. It easily opens like butter, the cap of the machine bursting out and slamming through your ceiling to the first floor. Fuck. A ball of mustard-colored light exits out, bringing with it a dumb cylinder with the same color. It's a wonder how you didnt die considering how condensed everything is in here.

==>

In the middle of your attempt to relay this info to Mona, you're greeted with a screaming cretin.

Chatlog

Spoiler:

==> STRIFE!



As the ball of yellow light sends out random gibberish and audible symbols, you rush over to stand atop the ALCHEMITER. Bringing out your rifle, you prepare to fire at the fucker and upon doing so....the little pellet is stopped by some shitty cog. Upon further examining your foe, this guy is...more of a freak of nature than you first assumed. A sea of sweat escapes the side of your face, your mind realizing what you must do.

> ABSCOND

You attempt to YOUTH SCAMPER the fuck out of there, only to have it...hapen. Your foot collides with the can of sprite you failed to land in the box and your face makes an arrangement with the ground-floor. You and the can of sprite are sent back, however you slam into the cruxtruder and make it back to square one. -The can on the other hand slams into the bright-orb.

==>

The sprite is created, yet all it makes in terms of sounds is the light crisps of a can opening. What the fuck is this. In your moment of comprehending the sheer amount of pain inflicted on you at once, you curl up on the machine for a second. -The pellet that was once stopped is sent flying over to knock over your lamp on your nightstand.

It reveals an aged figurine that you procured from an old garage sale. The legendary Soft-Drink mascot icon, Pepsi-Man. Thank god the shitty light defended it. As it should.

Spritesprite sends a few more beat-box can-opening mixtapes your way before hovering around the room. It...doesn't seem all to bright.[/color]

==>Return to the Girl

you are once again Alie, and you think you have an idea on how to get the lid off of the Machine, it will take some sneakiness, but you think you can do it. you have tied a few of your bed sheets together, and have created a makeshift rope so that you can get out your second story window without pops seeing you. you then take the side door into the garage, where you get your hands on a crowbar. which you then put into your purse modus.

you then climb back up the rope, back into your room, and quickly untie all the sheats, and put them back on your bed so that pops won't know what's up if he comes in your room. you then spend a good five minutes rummaging through your purse modus, until you finally find the card with the crowbar on it, which you pull out and start prying at the lid to the big squarish machine.

after a bit of effort, the lid comes off, and a big glowy thing comes out, you turn the wheel on the side and a blue totem comes out. which you look at, and you think you know exactly what to do with it, you take it to the other big machine, and put it on the pedestal, where it fits perfectly and after a few button presses you make. . .
1 perfectly generic object!!!!
you look at them and wonder if they are indeed perfectly generic, or if you could, in fact, create something more generic. maybe if it were more of a generic blue rather than a generic green, although you could see them being half decent for building something, you decide that that was not what you were supposed to create.
You take the totem, put a blank card into the elongated machine, and put the totem where it looks like it's supposed to go. you press a button, the thing rotates the totem, but in the end, the totem looks exactly the same, maybe its not supposed to appear any different? you stick the totem back on the creator machine, and this time you make. . .
1 Perfectly Generic Object!!!
well darn

==> You are now PSS and you are in absolute agony, they said that fucker Dick was unreliable. They were damn right, you should never trust a void player... especially one you can't monitor. You simultaneously try to fight off the urge to murder the human known as PENN while complying to your newfound sprite knowledge. Oh, will you look at that, Penn just shot at you! Isn't this great, BOY Earth is fun.

==> Timestop 0.2

You freeze the bullet in mid air for exactly 30 seconds, thus taking off 30 seconds from the initial meteor timer you placed above Dick's hive. To think that the Penn you knew could rip out a man's own soul from their body. Anyways it looks like you accidentally caused him to sprite a metal tin can. You wonder how that's going to effect the Queen...

==> Timestop 0.8

You decided to get this over with as quickly as you can. As if clutching a wound in your gut you curl up to channel your energy, only to throw your arms out sending a massive timestop wave that freezes everything in a 15m radius. You float past the non-overpowered Penn and flick him on the nose while he's frozen, you suspect that's the only real amount of violence the faceless being inside you can summon. You then proceed to punch a card, create the blue tube thing (you still can't remember half of these things), place it in the sewing machine thing, and finally alchemize Penn's thingy to enter the medium. A massive Yellow tree juts out from the center of the Alchemizer and proceeds to grow straight through the Hole left earlier from Penn's reckless actions.

==>

You teleport to the second story... or more like the first of Penn's home. Oddly, there's no fruit. You glance about until you spot the frozen flames of a luxury fireplace.  The tree, seemingly unaffected by the timestop seems to be leaning that direction. With your COMPLETELY NON-PORNOGRAPHIC TENDRILS you yank the tree gently towards the flames, and eventually spread some frozen flame onto it's branches. You're guessing Penn has to wait for the tree to fully catch fire or something.

==> Remove timestop

You snap your fingers and the timestop is removed, the tree flings back into it's original position while rapidly being set ablaze. Penn can handle it from here.

==>

You teleport back into the basement of the hive and quickly view who Penn's been monitoring: Mona. You promptly flip Penn off; something you would never do on your own, and teleport instantly to Mona through THE INTERNET.

==> OH GOD THE VISIONS

Immediately after teleportation you let out a horrific cry of agony that's enough to shake the room, that was close... he could have gotten out.

Dialogue :

==> Stalk Dick

You switch to Dick who being the good boy he is has- Wait... HOLY SHIT! DICK'S ALREADY IN THE MEDIUM?! WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED? Oh... oh god... why is... that's just awful. Dick's been spending his ample time dissecting what would previously be considered Poppiko's corpse. He's filled it to the brim with putrid and deformed homonculi which are now feasting upon his alien organs. Dick in the meanwhile is taking notes on the squirming, fleshy things. With a single intense ogle he seems to command the things at will, they slip into a small metal pipe underneath Dick's bed and vanish. You apologize for not being ready to be viewed on time.

==> Pester Alie

Pesterlog:

Alie doesn't get the message, as her pops still has the internet down, and she doesn't have access to any of her devices right now. and while she is having quite a bit of trouble getting in, she has no way of letting dick know so, and so she must do this on her own, yet she has no idea what still to try.

as she is pacing her room, wondering what to try next, she notices something on the floor, right around where she had been making the sheet rope for the crowbar, it is a captalogue card that has holes in it. you take that and put it in the slot for the long machine, press the button, and it spins the dowel, but this time, a knife type thing comes down, and starts carving the totem,

as it is doing that, pops comes in and catches you red-handed, and immediately starts a verbal strife, starting out with a pointed question, you are done with this, and throw the closest thing you can reach, at him. it hits him square in the face, and for a stuffed animal, actually looks like it does quite a bit of damage. he looks at you stunned, then says, "so, that's how it's going to be", and gets into a defensive position. and thus starts a STRIFE!!!!

neither of you have very good strife specibi, and so neither of you pull it out, and so you start to think on your feet, and you throw some of your heavier stuffed animals at him, he does them, looks around your room, for anything a bit harder, alas most everything in your room is either soft and plushy, or light and flimsy and so you are forced to fight each other with whatever you can find.

he grabs one of the stuffed animals you threw at him, and wields it like a sword, unfortunately, it's the one with the beenbag at the bottom, and if it lands a solid hit, you will probably be done for, he swings at you using it kinda like a mace, but you youth roll under his legs, and just punch him in the back, he looses his balance for a second, but manages to catch it, but by doing so he lets go of his weapon, and it falls out a window behind him, you go and hide in your pile of plush animals, and just bombard him as fast as you can with them, and he keeps chucking as many back at you as fast as he can, as nothing seems to be getting done, you, filled with rage, charge at him, he side steps, and you crash through the wall behind him.

you pull your hand out of the wall, he looks at the hole, and then just walks off, you stan there shocked, things actually got physical. you are not sure who won, but you almost feel bad for beating him up, you want to say you are sorry, but your pride gets in the way, and you just watch him drive off.wanting to get your mind off of things, you take the totem which has managed to stay in the lathe, and put it on the alchemiter. it produces a pinwheel, you blow on it, everything turns white, you hear a ding from your computers connecting to the internet, things start dimming, and then the ground shifts beneath your feet, you trip, hit your head, and pass out.

==> Be the druggie again.

As soon as you steal the view, you are visibly LOSING YOUR SHIT. This seemed to be only one part of the shitstorm, but it was likely to get even shittier at this pace.. Shitmageddon. You watch as Penn bounces about his room, carefully trying not to knock over anything, or worse-- crush one of his prized novelty items. He'd have your head for that!

==>

As you look back around for Penn, he seemed to be.. Frozen? What was going on with him? His.. "sprite" was formed, but the one you'd seen before was g-- OH JESUS FUCK IT'S BEHIND YOU WHAT THE SHIT.

Dialogue:

==>

Oh.. Oh. It was here to help you. Sweet! That means it probably helped Penn, too!.. By freezing him for a hot minute. You were too enthralled by this alien-looking deity to check back on your screen. Hopefully that was enough room for Penn, because you had to get yourself into the game.. Err.. Medium. Whatever it was called, you had to get your rump a-movin'.

OOC:

==>

You are PENN and...what were you doing? A weird feeling grows on your nose which reminds you about that red-asshole that invaded your home earlier. After taking a moment to understand your surroundings, it seems like Mona finally took your advice and moved the place around, but now a new problem arised.

==>

You turn for literally a few seconds and see a goddamn TREE in your room. The yellow piece of shit is larger than your room as apparently it decided to grow through the newly formed hole above. It's time to get a move on with this dumb game. Spritesprite continues to make can opening sounds and sizzles with carbonation. What a dumbass. You immediately abscond to avoid being with them for any longer.

==>

Carefully, you move up the steps to the first floor of the house. The hole goes through the dining room above. The poor table has taken a hell of a beating from your mishaps. As you move up, a bright light consumes the bottom floor. That...can't be good. Considering the last fuckin weird thing was some creepy cog-red-asshole, you keep moving to the second floor.

==>

As you make the journey to the staircase, a smokescreen begins filling the house. Your eyes water and a few wheezes escape your mouth. What's going on here?

==>

Oh no. Oh dear god no.

Your UNCLE is currently trying to put out the intense fire going on with the tree. Regardless of how many times he splashes water on it, it grows back to the exact same intensity. What the FUCK is going on here. Your UNC' berates you for your negativity and blames you for this flash-forest fire. An argument begins.

==>

You bicker with him for so much about this that you decide to really make this your fault. Since he wants to get snippy and teach you about KARMA and CHAKRA mumbo-jumbo, you move over to the bathroom. Inside the sink cabinet is one of the many lighters used by the legendary pot-head and some bug-spray you used a total of fucking once.

Why would you need it if you dont go outside?

==>

Returning to the scene, you attempt to pull of the flamethrower combo with the items only to be reminded that aerosolkind is a proper abstrata. The can is ejected into the fire and immediately explodes when in contact with the fire. Your UNCLE absconds and attempts to block the incoming explosion for you. The tree is burst into flames and coincidentally explodes into nothing! A bright light consumes the room.

==>



You 'enter' the game, but after all of that...you need a breather and staying in this recently burnt house isn't going to help. You make your way out...

==>

You are now PSS...

Dialogue:

You try to teleport through Mona's computer into their host's, only to find it on lockdown. Slowly, you can feel the panic seeping in. You teleport briefly to check the timer on the meteor. 56 seconds... shit.

==>

You start spasming irratically while yell/questioning a variety of incomprehensible questions. It seemes practically impossible to save the player at this time, yet you feel that somehow this was all a part of Dick's plan. You've never met him in the past/future, but somehow he managed to single handedly send you what he referred to as a "Birthday Gift" across time and space by manipulating others. What made it worse was that the gift he send you was actually your long lost horns attached to a headband. Initially you were thrilled that you had your old horns back again, but after a while you began to quesion how the fuck an alien from another planet knew about your own grubhood, especially a part of it that you've kept secret from others for years. Just the thought of it now sends shivers down your elongated spine.

Dialogue:

==>

You are almost immediately thrown into a panicked state yet again after a brief moment of relief. Okay, so you were unable to get into this "Medium".. That probably wasn't too major, right? Oh, of course it was, you idiot! You were really going to give Alie a piece of your mind for this once you get.. Somewhere!

==> Grab things..?

Dialogue:

You didn't HAVE five minutes! You flung yourself out of your chair, quickly pocketing your knife and staring at your laptop for a moment.. Before closing that as well and tucking it under your free arm. You still had ONE FREE ARM, due to the fact that DOTTIE was now sitting where your laptop once was.

Oh lord, you had so much shit.. Quick, grab your.. REALLY GAY SATCHEL? It would hardly fit much other than your laptop and bong, but.. Fuck it, it had to work. As fast as you could, you'd speed around the room, trying to grab everything you need. That just so happened to be your phone and handy bag of moonrocks, considering the only other two items you cared about were in it already.

==>

You sling the heavy ass satchel across your body, grabbing DOTTIE with plenty of time to spare.. Which only happened to be about 30 seconds or so.

Dialogue:

==>

You are again PENN and...uh. You aren't sure you like what's going on here. The upstairs is currently venting out, but the outside seems to be much too dark for you to actually see. You move around the ground floor, worried about where the hell your UNCLE went after the dumb tree exploded.

==>

A hand goes up to your forehead and out of your pocket emerges a cellphone! You slowly install Pesterchum, which surprisingly isn't taking as long as you originally thought. Whatever.

==>

With nowhere else to go, you open up your door and another bright as fuck light fills the room. It pierces through your shades, but reveals a relatively serene meadow in front of you. A metal dome surrounds your home and above you seems to be a straight shot to the sky. A few weird circle things hover above to boot. Where the fuck are you.

==>

You move around the empty grassland, eventually stopping in front of a large gate. Without any warning, the fucker begins shaking. It slowly opens, the screetch of the metal consuming the dome. It seems like everything here has been automated for your arrival. -Though you regret having the gall to actually come near the door...

==>

Outside is a path and the ceiling above is blocked off with metal wire. Something tells you that this isn't just a simple fork in the road. As you attempt to flee the scene, a few revolting yellow creatures come closer. A shitty HUD hovers over them, revealing their names.

It's a few AMBER IMPS and a MALACHITE IMP. -You have no idea what that actually means. They look like masked figures, their very body giving off a carbonated sizzle. A few tendrils wiggle about from them. These things are crazy dangerous.

==>

They rush up, engaging a strife with you. With the retrieval of your rifle, you send a few potshots at the trio. It...barely scratches the MALACHITE IMP, but you saw some damage. About 1/5th of the AMBER IMP's health vial moves down.  Yeah...no. You glance back, noticing more cretins filling the meadow. With the only safe road being the outside the DOME, you ABSCOND.

==>

They follow you, unsurprisingly. You fire a few more shots, popping the AMBER creatures into....fruit gushers? -No...that looks like the build grist from earlier! Considering the MALACHITE weirdo is still standing, you grip on the barrel of the rifle and move over to bash the motherfuckers head in. With a few swings, you easily take them down.

With that, you move up two rungs!

Level Up!:

Spoiler:

==>

With your running and fight with those creatures...you're actually a little lost. -Okay, maybe not a little. A lot.

Uh oh. You bring up your phone, loading up Pesterchum and immediately begin a chat with the fucker that brought you here.

Pesterlog:

[/color]

==>

You return to Dick.

Pesterlog:

Dick stares at the computer monitor for a brief moment before literally losing his shit and flipping the table. He clenches his hands repeatedly as if he had a therapy ball in the palm of each. After a while another notification began to appear on the now fallen computer, you fix it up and respond.

Pesterlog:

You briefly stare at the monitor once more before punching a hole straight through the screen in hidden rage. The blood and glass protruding from your hand almost seem to satisfy you. Boy, you're pretty cool, you think to yourself.

==>

you wake up, kinda wondering what just happened, you remember having a fight with your dad, and decide that he managed to knock you out, or something to that effect you get up and are a bit wobbly on your feet. you look around the room, trying to get this mist out of your head, and trying to figure out what you should do. you decide that you should probably apologize to pops, you were both enraged, you should not have started chucking stuff at him.

==>

you go downstairs, and start trying to look for pops, but can't find him, and you remember watching him drive off, and decide that's probably where he is. you hear a computer ding in another room, signifying that wifi is on, and you decide to go check your pesterchum while pops is away, at least explain the situation that you are grounded you sneak into pop's room, and grab your phone, as you cant let him win all the way, go up to your room, and open up pesterchum.

Pesterlog:

==>get some fresh air.

you decide that some fresh air, may help you clear your head. you get up, still wobbly, but manage to make it to the window, which you lean against, and open up. you look outside, and realize, you are not in Kansas anymore(not like she ever was in Kansas, but in Idaho) instead you see the

==> Be someone else.
You are now Ekliat Bodrig, a dapper tophatter with feverish fingers of fury. She is currently typing away at her husktop with wild abandon, eyes glued to the screen. She pauses for a few moments to take off the hat, before continuing once more.

Pesterlog:

==> Be proud of deeds.

There. That should rattle their caps, albeit slightly. She opened the can of some sort of beverage and opened her desk's draw to look at her favourite poster that no one can ever know about ever.

==> Watch poster.

... Troll Will Smith. That's much better. Lights up the whole room.

Poster:

==> HUH

With no warning whatsoever, you switch to a... horned character in a dark purple and decently illuminated room. Only their backside is visible, the figure lazily sitting on a wheeled chair in front of a computer. One of their black sneakers is pressed against the floor, swaying the seat left and right in a leisurely matter. The blue light of the computer before them highlighting short and tousled black hair and vibrantly colored horns. Their elbow is propped up on the desk, acting as a stand for their head to lean on.

The view of their computer is mostly blocked by their head, but a portion of the screen is visible. It appears that a browser labeled Trollian is visible, on one of the tabs is a few differently colored lines stretch upwards, on the other a human is visible.

==> Introduce yourself

What are you, some pretentious high-blood brat?

==> Please introduce yourself and switch to second-person

See? That wasn't too hard was it? Unfortunately, it's a little too early to introduce yourself. ..Actually it's a little too late to introduce yourself, but you won't give the specifics of that just yet.

But since you asked so politely, you will switch to second person and monologue a bit.

==>

You hate purple. You despise the color purple. It wasn't always like this, you were pretty positive about the various colors in the universe. The stars, planets, and all the space shit were all sorts of colors, including purple.

However, having purple litter your vision for what seemed like an eternity has caused you to become very sick of the color. Because of this, you often would go outside and stand on top of the ship and stare at the vast expanse of space in a desperate attempt to ignore the purple battleship you stood on. You'd talk to the stars while you're at it too, but this wasn't anything abnormal. You talked to the stars back when you still lived on your home planet too, they told you vague predictions of the future. This, unfortunately, happened very rarely. Sometimes that wasn't even them speaking, it was just the little voice inside your head telling you bullshit, rendering a good bunch of your predictions inaccurate. The stars rarely spoke to you, and when they did, it was very brief. You have no idea why they're extremely uncooperative with you when you know for a fact, thanks to some artifact digging that happened a very long time ago, that they were much more talkative with your ancestor.

Despite the stars' stubborn silence, they decided to utter one sentence recently. "Worry not, your boredom will end soon."

Thank whatever deity out there for that. Conversation with the others on the ship was becoming still, and you're running out of material to research. And of course, anything to distract you from shitty, monotonous PURPLE.

==> Stop monologuing

Yea, you assume you've rambled enough. It's time to do whatever you were about to do. You adjust your position and stop leaning on your hand. You focus on the screen before your eyes, focusing on the small tab with a human with fluffy black hair tucked under a beanie, gripping their satchel after hastily packing a bunch of random items and facing what you assume is their sprite- wait a fucking second.

==>

You squint at the screen, leaning over slightly to get a better look. For a good seven seconds, you glare at the tab with piercing suspicion.......

..........

Ah well shit nevermind that. What you are more interested in is the alien! A living, breathing alien that probably won't die within the next hour! An alien that isn't a limp cadaver! They look pretty similar to your species, you were hoping for some bizarre intelligent spider species with wings.. But an alien's an alien!

==>

Your mouth morphs into a mischievous grin and your hand reaches out and drags closer a pencil and a small journal, intended to store research notes on alien life which had been sadly empty up until now, that had been lying next to your husktop. You give the black-haired human one more glance before pulling up another Trollian tab to message them. You have been searching for them for way, way too long.

==> S p e a k  t O  t h e  b e a n i e  w e a r i n g  h u m a n

Pesterlog:

==>

You notice that you're being much more talkative than usual, which usually only happens when you're forcing one of your companions to listen to a lecture regarding space. You suppose you feel quite excited (but you try not to get your hopes up if something unfortunate were to happen) due to this rare opportunity to converse with an alien, so of course you're feeling more talkative. You're going to squeeze as much info out of this human as you can before they enter the medium and become too busy to answer your inquiries for more than five minutes. You have lots to ask this human.

You admit that you were... acting a little ungrateful for a few moments while contacting the human. But you stick to your opinion that these humans do look bland. But you haven't seen more than ten humans so far, maybe some were more interesting-looking than others? Let's not forget that their culture is most likely very different to your species' culture. Do they have a hemospectrum and a blood caste system? Who rules over them? Questions, questions.

==> Remember something

Oh shit. You remember (against all odds) now that you're supposed to be trolling these aliens instead of interviewing them to fill up your alien research book. What a downer. Looks like you'll have to postpone your interrogation.. Unless you say fuck all to orders and do whatever the fuck you want.

Pesterlog:

==>

You watch intently at the screen before you, tapping a claw against the desk as you waited for the human’s next action, swaying your chair left and right in a steady rhythm.

as you are watching the scenery of your new land, wondering what you got yourself into, you hear your phone ding, you check it, but it is not from OO as you expected, but from some HT, and it looks like they are trolling you, you didn't even know that pesterchum had a troll setting, you think you will go looking for it later, also, it is not a very good troll, it feels more like casual conversation, you decide to bate him on, se what kinds of trolls he has.

Pesterlog:

with that done, you then acknowledge you probably aren't going to go backward back to earth, and so the only way to get back to earth will be to win this game, pops wont be happy, but what else is new.

==>

you go onto your computer. and run the sburb files, not totally sure what to do, but it looks like the client just connects you back up with Dick. you leave that running while you load up the server program, which gives you a view of Mona's room. things look to be in trouble though, you are actually surprised she is still there with all that is going on, you decide to as long as he is still there, to place down all the machines, and give her the pre-punched card, although if it were up to you, you would have run for cover from that asteroid headed straight for her house

As Dick stared at his bleeding knuckles while trying to pick out parts of computer monitor from his hand a sudden though occurred to him, he hadn't even been outside to see where he ended up landing. He opened the second drawer in his desk and pulled out a first aid kit in an attempt to mend his wounds. Only, the one thing in the box that was left was a variety of multicolored bandaids. God, do you hate color. Regardless, you stick them on your wounds and leave the room.

==>Examine family photo.

As you walk down the hallway you look at the pictures hung on the wall before. Previously you had chosen to ignore them, but now a instinct that smells of exposition is tempting you to examine it in detail. A family of four stand solemnly next to one another, you, your sister, father, and mother. After father's divorce mother and sister have gone off the grid from what you've heard. Or maybe you yourself have.

==>

You return to the living room, streaks of blood from when you dragged Poppiko's body into your own room leave a trail of where you went while out of frame. The heavy sound of rain and thunder crashes above, and instinctively you grab your BLUE RAIN PONCHO off the coat hanger.

==> Walk outside.



You open the front door of your house only to find a massive 30ft drop into water and darkness below. Insane amounts of wind and rain lash against your face as you try to make out your surroundings. Your own house seemed to be placed atop a variety of morphed stone towers, other towers similar to this litter the flooded ground below. You are now in...






Before you could find a safer round down a forceful push is given by a bizarre stranger. Dressed like a jester, the black imp slaps you right on the back causing you to plummet into the water below. You don't scream, but stare with extreme intensity at the inky jester in rage. It stands on the edge, petrified by your brief glance before closing the door.

==> Check up on Mona

You are now PSS and flipping the FUCK out over what to do with Mona. You've heard of what the black tyrant Dick does to those who fail their missions. At least you could get them to safety before Dick loses his shit. Just seconds before choosing to teleport both you and Mona to safety you see all the starter items drop.

==> TIMESTOP 1.0!!!!!!???????

You use the best of your timestop abilities to not only freeze the area around you and Mona, but to practically freeze the entire WORLD for 9 seconds. Dozens of tendrils erupt from your back as you complete each task at once. Then, time returned to normal as both the kernelsprite appeared from thin air along with the strange alchemized entrance device. A long purple rope lie tied in a complicated knot on the alchemy slab and immdiately your sprite instincts kicked into play.

==> Untie the rope

You're too panicky to actually untie it, and it seemed that the more you tried to untie it the harder to do such it got. Suddenly, you realized.

Dialogue:

You wake up from your daydreaming of Troll Will Smith to find a notification coming from your husktop. Before you respond, you take a moment to examine your own surroundings. This has been your home for an indiscernible amount of time and it didn't take too much remodeling to get a sense of what your home was back on your home planet- considering the whole thing is fucking purple. And your room back home, was still fucking purple(ish). You're... Not really sure what to think of the colour purple right now, although you're pretty sure some of your lower-blood companions are done with it.

==> Switch to second-person for room examination. If you please.

Inside her room is a dresser, with a wide variety of costumes inside of it. Ranging from spooky costumes to fancy dress, she loves every piece of your remaining collection- although she wouldn't be caught dead in some of the stuff she had.

Ekliat stood up to examine some of the offending articles. A costume from her younger sweeps, a quackbeast. Another costume from her younger self, a large dark purple hood- unfortunately lacking it's scythe. A more recent addition was a tailored dress that she never got around to wearing- frankly for quite obvious reasons. And finally, a suit and tie complete with an antique pocket watch that she actually did wear on quite a few occasions. It fit quite well with her hat, anyhow.

She wasn't particularly attached to her little crab consorts, yet she did take one with her that she had befriended on her journey. Charlesworth is his name, how do you do?

==>Greetings.

Charlesworth makes a pleasant gesture back towards you. He is such an excellent companion.

==> Proceed with interrogations.

Right, important work to be done. She sits down on her chair once more and begins typing yet again.

Pesterlog:

She decided not to answer her last question, as that would just provide more questions in her mind than answers. Take it slow with the trolling, let them feel the burn. The anger, and the hatred.

This was almost certainly worth the wait.

==>

Pesterlog:

You are again, PENN, but god damnit are you lost. A ungodly horde of IMPs fill the corridors of the maze. They slowly dwindle at your HEALTH VIAL, as the health cubes you get from the slain enemies only does so much. Their usage of tendrils and whatever the hell else they’re using to assault you. They seem to be getting a little easier after a few rungs are raised, but…

==>

You feel something shaking. The sudden menacing feeling consuming the area gets to you. You keep moving ahead, a spinning mini-spirograph is set in the corner. Considering this is a deadend, you’re cool with that. You begin strutting up to it.

==>

Suddenly, you notice a large cretin enter the area. The creature seems to be fucking ENRAGED for no reason. It’s horns are broken, it’s very being fizzes. It’s feet smash the ground below, the rocks being frozen in time for a second before being dropped down. What the fuck is this guy. With no other choice, you attempt fire at it, but it freezes the round and it’s sent in an awkward trajectory toward the ground.

What the hell is going on here? It punches you square in the face, forcing you to lose your shoes and sending you flying into the Spirograph. It seems in order to continue through this part of the maze, you’ll have to defeat that motherlubber.

==>

The Spirograph sent you back home, your body slamming through the front door and sliding across the floor. A beam of light hits you, refilling your health steadily, a voice speaking up to you.

Spritelog:

You’re eyes close and you fall asleep on the spot.

Pesterlog:

they obviously know you, and so you hope that if you pretend to know who they are, you can get them to give you information that you can use to troll them much better than they are doing with you.

==> Be Mona.

As the screaming sprite seems to summon all of your items from thin air, your STUFFED COMPANION leaps out of your arms towards what appears to be your KERNELSPRITE. The light is momentarily blinding as you're nearly knocked flat on your ass by what was produced..

DOTTIESPRITE

The massive glowing blue-ish purple bear almost immediately begins to zip about your room, letting out hellish screeches that bears in general shouldn't be able to make.. Especially ones without mouths. You feel your phone buzz in your pocket, but before you're able to do much, your newly created sprite snatches your knife from you!

==>

It skillfully cuts the odd purple rope that the other red sprite was just screaming about as you're trying to recover from the shock that had washed over you.

==> Cheer.

Dialogue:

You grind your palm into your face as you read her message. Stupid alien, trying to deceive her deceiver? Just who does she think she is? Whatever, you may as well state your purpose. Enough being an asshole, kinda (okay you were still going to be an ass), but it's time to make parley with these aliens. Get on their good side.
Because maybe they can help you.

Pesterlog:

==>Look at other kids
You take a glance around the room, despite the questionable statement, before switching views on your screen to someone else. You... Don't know what his name is, but he needs a haircut. He's also currently in some liquid after being pushed out of his front door. You find this kind of amusing, and decide to talk to him.

==>Proceed with plans.

Pesterlog:

You smile to yourself. Honestly, wasn't he supposed to be the leader? Set an example, or something, man. This 'team' of aliens, if you could even call them a team, seemed like they would have a tough time getting through all of this.

==>

Dick falls face first into the water below, the impact wasn't that bad but you've landed directly into a moving stream. The water thrashes you about and slams you against countless pieces of stone rubble. This goes on for a short while until your poncho eventually snags onto a piece of stone that hasn't been submerged completely yet. You climb up and catch your breath. Blood trickles down your face but you don't feel any pain, you only feel embarrassment and frustration. It would be a big hit to your ego if you died this early in the game. The blood from your forehead trickles into one of your eyes and you briefly wipe away the plastered bangs to clean it. You think you may have gotten a concussion as the world around you seems to be spinning.

==> Do the one thing you shouldn't do when you have a concussion.

You decided to take a nap right smack on the pile of rocks, what an inspiration you are to others. As you rest your eyes remain open, they aren't visible from the way you positioned yourself but beneath that mop of hair a variety of colors can just be seen glowing brighter and dimmer as each color imaginable makes its way.

==>

You awake in a completely purple bedroom, similar to your own, yet with less busts and self made books. You realize where you are immediately... DERSE. The computer on your desk makes a noise and you check to see what it is, some fool is harassing your (slightly flawed) plan.

Pesterlog:

You stare at the computer monitor for a brief moment before flipping the table once again, you're on the prescription father's been giving you but it hasn't seemed to help much. Then again you've been weaning off them lately as to be more focused, that's probably it.

==> Look out window.

You stare out the circular window and start to think if there even was a window where the bastard who just messaged you was, or if it was even on the right side. Either way, just having the stranger who you presume to be poppiko's co-players look around is enough of a HAH! to satisfy you. You look down at all the Dersians below, then look at another tower parallel to yours. It seems to be nearly identical. You pick up a pair of binoculars you threw on the floor in rage and look through them. Only to find someone else looking right back at you...

PENN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You fucking lose your shit and smash straight through the window, without even realizing you float over through the air over to him, a sadistic smile appears on your face as you flick open your trusty baton.

you scream highly obscure curse words from highly obscure surroundings at Penn as slowly, you float your way over to him.

==> Check up on Mona.

You are now PSS, and before you could do anything else it seems another sprite has been created, some creepy doll or something picks up a knife and chops the knot in two. Immediately everyone, including the house and everything within it is transported to the medium. You lay exhausted on the floor from all the intense things that just occurred. A message seems to have popped up on Mona's computer.

Wait a second... OH GOD NO YOU REMEMBER THIS!

Pesterlog:

==>

You are the fucker who's being jumped on, but it seems like somethings off. The 'Penn' he's flying up to is sleepwalking. His body drifting around doing absolutely nothing important. His naturally hate inducing appearance seems to be his certain downfall with this insane mother-fucker coming his way. His mythological role kicks in a bit as a part of him grows stronger from stealing from his comrade.

-Huh.

==>

He keeps moving away, his body eventually floating into the sea of dersites. The fear in the eyes was enough to signify that his title was not one filled with respect. A few papers are scattered around the place warning those about the dormant princes of dersite royalty and their destructive personalities. They're each worth boonbucks to whatever sucker has the balls to fight them.

Which noone but the agents are to be fair.

==>

DICK, assuming he's still following the fucker, could see that he's just bumping into walls and spooking the locals. With the royals treading the streets, it's sure to attract the Queens attention. Do they really want that? Does anyone?

==>

A endless sea of sand is seen, a few rocks placed about with a collection of horses treading it's lands. The light wind causes a sandstorm to be kicked up. Penn is placed smack dab in the middle of this little collection of beauty.

==>

You don't remember what exactly prompted you to end up here, but it's weird. You could've sworn you saw something else before you ended up here, but that's...fine? You waltz around, your eyes trailing across the infinite dunes. It's a little weird, but this gives you a moment to reflect. Something you've long lost for awhile now. Hopefully nothing wakes you up from this.

As you say that, the scene shifts around and you take a look at that one nasty winter in your town. Put the power out, so you were forced outside to 'play'.

==>

Naturally, you just used your game-boy, but this cold still was shit. As you continue on your quest in the game, a figure taps you on the shoulder. A fairly large brown-tinted male in some bland duds stands behind you.

The weirdo motions his hands to your gameboy. He says no words, as he simply wants to know what it is your playing. Out of fear, you allow him to peek over your shoulder, but that's about it. What a fucking weird ass dream.

==> Switch to the alien who should probably comb their hair sometime soon

You switch back to the unkempt troll who is exactly in the same position where you left them save for their right hand shifting away from their journal and both hands hovering over their keyboard, the fingers covered in dry paint from a recent art-making spree. Their irises are currently honed in on the tab showing the human they were just messaging, awaiting their next action.

==> BE the unkempt troll

You become the the troll hunched over on their chair, strained lookstubs piercing the screen. You are currently waiting for the alien who you dub as the "Beanie Human" to respond to your questions, you are itching to learn some information about an alien species, after all. But it would seem "Beanie", a nickname that will stay even if it annoys the human, once they give you their actual name you may start referring to them as that. However, if their name some how happens to be incredibly shitty, you will keep calling them "Beanie" until the day either they or you die, which will hopefully not be anytime soon.

They don't respond to your message, which is understandable since they are currently busy attempting to escape their doomed planet, a barrage of meteors making their way towards their location at alarming speeds. What happens next, however, causes your expression to morph into one of both surprise and confusion.

As you are viewing the human, you seem to blank out for a second. In a few milliseconds, you recover and regain your focus... Only to see that human once completely unprepared to enter the Medium be surrounded by all the starter items that seemingly appeared out of no where. Their sprite has suddenly been created too! They have been just been transported to the Medium! What the fuck? Did their host finally wake up and start getting shit done? But there was no way the host could've created all the starter items within one second...

....What you feel after after blanking out... Feels unnatural. You can't exactly describe it with any other word. You know you wouldn't space out without warning in a moment like this, not when you're eager to ask the hundreds upon hundreds of questions you have to ask these aliens about their culture, daily life, and much more. Not when the human you are currently viewing had no starter items placed and had 45 seconds before the meteors reached their location. And you are very certain you didn't use your signature psionic power, "BLANK OUT", on yourself. Something is definitely UP.

==> Take a closer look

Despite the annoying little voice in your head complaining about your strained lookstubs and that you should close the husktop and rest your poor, poor look stubs, you inch your face even closer to your husktop's screen. Your focus is once again on the faceless sprite you noticed earlier. You observe that the faceless sprite.... Has eerily familiar horns. That.. couldn't be right. Before your inspection can continue, Mona is whisked off to the Medium.

You can't help but view the mysterious sprite as a telltale sign that some problems will occur in the future. Problems that you all probably don't want to deal with. You'll consult the stars later when things are a little less hectic. But for now you'll have to try to figure things out on your own.

==> Get to the bottom of this

You know already that the faceless sprite isn't Beanie's sprite, seeing that they have just turned what looks like a screeching stuffed bear into their sprite. You check the other humans to see if any of them have a missing sprite.

==> View the other humans

Swiftly, you change your viewing tab to see the other humans, one-by-one. One human who seems to be knocked out, who is immediately hateable as soon as you see them, and another is in the Medium, using their the computer. You switch to the final human you have yet to check. You view them just in time to see that oh shit that imp just fucking shoved them off a cliff.

==>

You watch as the human, who should probably get a haircut sometime soon if they get out of this alive, fall, and fall, and fall. They reach the end of their descent, and the raging river violently greets them. You watch as the human proceeds to smack into multiple rocks and get knocked the fuck out. You almost pity this poor creature, less than 10 seconds in the Medium and he immediately gets his shit kicked in. This unfortunate bastard. Fate completely shitted on them.

You almost forget what you were actually looking for... But you conclude you found the human that the faceless sprite belongs to the human who was just KOed by a river and some rocks, seeing that there was no sprite around them at the time that was there to save them. You really, really hope that they are not dead before all the players have even entered the Medium. A death this early is, without a doubt, not a good sign. Fortunately, their dream self is still alive so they are not completely dead yet.

==> Contact the human who should probably get a haircut sometime soon

Pesterlog: