Sbarb: Fairy God Trolls

BS: did you just turn it into one of the monsters from your scary story's
you nervously take a bite out of your cookie and hear the door down stairs slam
BS:brb sounds like mom is home
retrieve disk===>
so she has it
you go down stairs and find your mom putting a tray of cookies into the oven when she sees you she tells you she has your disk and will only return it to you if you if you show her a perfect The Violin Concerto by Schoenberg (the hardest pice to play on violin I researched it ) this may take a wile.

==> Aren't you forgetting something.

Hmm watching Jeff reminds you of something, aren't quite sure of what it is exactly, but you are certain that it is quite important. You seem to recall that the object you are looking for is known for being quite sharp, and in some more severe cases, deadly. Although, you can't exactly remember what it is you're supposed to be taking right now.

==> Run down to the kitchen.

You run down the steps, JEFFSPRITE still following behind you, making sounds that you cannot comprehend in the slightest, with the curved object still in your hands. But this time an incredibly loud sound startles you on your way there, causing you to trip and fall down the steps in a both humiliating, if not somewhat amusing fashion, and also causing you to lose your object. Someone should have warned you about the stairs bro.

==> Pick yourself up and finish your task.

You stand up slowly feeling somewhat in pain, you have no idea what that sound was, but are sure that you'll feel really sore in the morning. Attempting to ignore the pain, you head out to the kitchen and immediately find what you were looking for, a butcher's knife used in your household to cut raw meat. Ah yes, you remember that you forget to allocate a weapon into your strife specibus, you never know when things could get too hot to handle. Even though you rarely find yourself in any sort of danger, thus meaning that having one on you for a weapon is somewhat pointless. Still though, you can't argue with the fact that carrying it around with you makes you look pretty damn cool.

==> Allocate your strife specibus to KNIFEKIND

You allocate your strife specibus to knife kind, and put the butcher's knife into it for safe keeping.

==> Go outside your home to check for the sound.

You go outside your home and are immediately greeted with several meteorites crashing down all around your neighborhood. You immediately begin to flip your shit.

==> Calm down!

You fail to calm down, there is a giant meteor heading your way, calming down does not seem like a very good idea in the slightest sense.

==> Check the timer.

Alright, you suppose that might be a somewhat logical idea, as insane as it may sound you think that this game might be somehow connected to the meteorites falling from the sky. You glance at the timer to see that you only have a small 30 seconds to finish whatever it is you need to do. You are so screwed.

==> Pick up the curved object from the floor.

You pick the object up once more and remember what BS said about there only being one machine left for you to use and decide to shoo Daron away. He hisses at you and runs away to the confines of your room to hide.

==> Look around for places to put the object in.

You search for places to put the object in, but at that very moment you hear the door opening and a very tall muscular man appears in the room, who just so happens to be your father. You stop dead in your tracks as he begins to glare at you. You've experienced this glare before, it is the one you get before you are inevitably grounded. He gives you a stern look of disapproval, and walks to his room sighing without saying a word. You are very surprised that he is like this given the fact that there are, you know, meteorites coming down from the sky to murder you. Perhaps he believes that the meteors aren't actually there, and are simply a hallucination caused by stress or something similar? You can never tell with that guy, hes always been pretty adamant, even when things are staring him right in the face.

==> Place the object on the circular pedestal.

You place the object onto the pedestal, and it immediately begins to scan it, are gray book with a lock on it appear on the platform, which you pick up. What the hell are you supposed to do with this thing.

==> HURRY IT UP YOU'RE GOING TO DIE YOU MORON!

More sounds can be heard everywhere, the timer is now at 8 seconds.

==> DO SOMETHING.

You're trying! You aren't sure what you're supposed to be doing with this, all you know is that you're going to die soon if you don't speed things up!

==> CUT THE LOCK THEN.

Of course! You aren't exactly sure if it'll work or not, but it's all you can think of right now and the timer is at 3 seconds.

==> CUT IT DUMB-ASS.

You cut the lock just in time, the timer hits 0 and a giant meteorite creates a giant hole where your home used to be.

You successfully escape death.

==> Be Evan

Evan appears to be eating an Orange Creamsicle.

==> Evan?

...The Creamsicle suddenly disappears in a puff of smoke.

==> ...?

...Evan sighs.

Evan, what have you been doing all this time- seriously?

...He tells you that he's just been staring at this computer, waiting to play.

==>Drydan: Resume control




==>Kill Da Titanzl




==>Seek help


TC: ~~ Ofinas, I Require Assistance ~~
TC: ~~ Can You Check That Guide I Posted ~~
TC: And See What The Heck It Is I Do Next?~~




ME: Hey there sweeties!
ME: I was just wondering when you two are gunna hook up?
ME: In a purely client/server relationship of course.
ME: That would be really awkward.
ME: Hehe, silly me!
ME: So yeah you two lovelies should really hook up client-server and such!

AU: what is this
AU: this was not discussed
AU: please explain the relevance of this
AU: contact with lesser species
AU: should not be made
AU: unless permission has been given
ME: Oohhh! You know, it's funny, because guess what you are!
AU: what
ME: Irrelivant <3 ~ hehe!


ME: Do me a favour.
ME: If this guy tries to talk to any of you.
ME: Please ignore him!
ME: He's a waste of space!

after seven tries you finally get the song right your mom gives you the disk and you go to your room and starts to install it then checks in on orin
BS: something's different with your house there weird things running around be carefull

==> Evan: ...Why Are You Still Staring- THERE'S HUMANITY!

...Evan stares, giving a subtle smirk.

==> NO! EVAN, NO, NO... DON'T YOU DARE ASK!

BA: I will if you do the following.
BA: First, who are you?
BA: Second, who was that?
BA: Third how do you know me?
BA: Fourth, why do you want us to play so much?
BA: Fifth, what achievements are there?
BA: And sixth and final question.
BA: Is there a good story?

BA: I believe what this 'person?'
BA: Means is that I should be your client...
BA: ...Which would leave grey-text guy to be your server....
BA: And then I'd server blue-text girl?

What an epiphany, Evan.

If I am correct, at least...

BS: ok just let me know when to open the file
you spot a bucket full of water in the corner you decide to catalog it incase you need to get something wet or if it comes to it to get a drink. you only have 4 free cards left

Blank Slate pesters bankruptAuthor
BS: ok my mom left so im free to play evan im opening the client file now
you click the file and watch the spirals as you wait

==> Evan, you may have to stop a second.

BA: Oh... Uh.
BA: One moment...
BA: It seems blue-text wants me to server her.
BA: B.R.B as some people say.

==> Evan: Respond To Blue-Text.

BA: Yes? What will I have to do again?

BA: Ah... Right.

==> Connect To Blue-Text.

BA: Well... Ooh- nice house, ...
BA: What's your name again?

==> Place Dose Free Stuff.

You do so.

...Wait. WAAAAIT A MOMENT!

BA: HOW THE HELL AM I SEEING YOUR HOUSE?!

BS: not sure but as my server you can place and move stuff around just as I can do so to orin as his server
you head down stairs to the cruxstruter and decide to mimic what orin did to get in first you drop your the bucket of water on the lid opening it and in the proses dumping the water on the kernel sprite making aqua sprite . next she spins the weal to get the cruxite the pick up the prepunched card and carves the dowel and aclamizes .... a blue cookie jar ok what do I do now
open it ====>
the lid wont come off
throw something at it ====>
you chuck the china doll at it and the doll shatters and

O.o there's a human skull inside it the sprite scoops it up to become aqua Geist sprite

you then wet your self and run with the jar
the timer has a little less than a minuet to go till boom

BA: So tell me...
BA: What's that timer for?
BA: Also, what happened once you server'd Orin?

You take a moment to sigh.

==> MEANWHILE:

You are now the sh*tty cosplayer.

You are walking to a cosplay convention dressed as a fictional creature you dreamed about last night, you pass a manor home to the Chavos family and get struck on the head by a meteor- dying instantly.

==> Back To Evan

BA: SHIT!
BA: What was that noise?!
BA: One moment!!!

You look out your window, seeing a TINY meteor... You proceed to walk back to your computer.

BA: ...Wow...
BA: ...Meteor shower just hit the outside of my house.
BA: ...Why didn't it make a crater?
BA: Oh I don't know...

as you run you trip and the jar bonces down the stairs and opens a cookie rolls out of it
oh yummy
as you swallow the blue bake good the timer hits 0 and your mom a block away waches the house disappear right before the meatier strikes

I guess ill get the mop ...that girls grounded till the end of the world

little did she know that isn't to far off

==> Evan?

....

==> ...Jesus, EVAN?!

WHAT!

==> Just ask...

.....

BA: WHAT
BA: THE
BA: HELL?!
BA: Right...
BA: o.O
BA: JEEEEEEESSSSSUS-OF-FAKE-TOWN!!!

wake up====>
sara comes too to the sight of weird little imps that look like water is poring off them then getting sucked back into there bodies also a chunk is missing of there face reviling there skull on the top right part of their head . they turn to face her one raises a dowel of cruxite up like a bat the other has a pair of oven mits on

STRIFE====>

imps x2 100%
sara 100%

imp #1 uses swing
sara takes 10%
sara uses guitar swing
imp #2 takes 12%

sara 90%
impsx2 88%

imp #1 uses trow
the attack missed
sara uses screem
imp #1 takes 12 %
imp#2 takes 12 %
all the glass in the house takes 100%

sara 90%
impsx2 64%
imps abscond
aqua Geist sprite uses mangle
imp#1 takes 30%
imp#2 takes 30%
sara uses bow cut
imp #1 takes 4 %
imps defeated

sara goes up the echaladder
she is no longer pants wetter and is now
MUSICAL NOVICE
lets see what someone elsh is up to wile you rest to heal

==> Orin: Examine your surroundings.

You have been standing around in a state of shock, after the meteorite hit the location of your home only shortly after you managed to escape. You are unaware of what it is you need to do next, nor do you know where it is you actually are, but you suppose that you won't find anything out just standing around passively like some sort of buffoon. It is time for you to get a move on.

==> Orin: Go back to your room.

You go back to your room, JEFFSPRITE no longer following you, in order to try and get back to your computer, but once you get there you notice something there, it seems to be...A monster, who is currently randomly mashing buttons on your computer no doubt spamming gibberish on Pesterchum.

==> Orin: Creep up on it slowly.

You decide to sneak up on the creature with the butcher's knife still in your now shaking hand, in an attempt to get the upper hand. You walk at a steady pace being careful not to alarm the monster.

==> Be the creature

You are now the odd creature, you seem to be enjoying yourself a great deal on the machine you found, and are currently just randomly pressing buttons onto the screen.

KD: sfanfoianwuwabrfnyw
KD: ADSADasdasdsadsanio
KD: asdasdaisnoinoiand

You are quite proud of yourself, truly there is no one else that could rival your mastery of language, you are simply too amazing.

==> Creature: Notice sounds coming from behind you.

You turn your back on the machine for a moment after hearing sounds that are uncannily similar to footsteps, and see some sort of vile monster looking shocked to see you and your face.

Your simply beautiful face.

==> Creature: Enter battle stance.

You don't like the way this punk is looking at you, he must pay for his misdemeanor with only the most fitting of punishments, death. You get off the chair and enter a battle stance, this should be easy, the fool looks like he might die of shock at any given moment.

==> Creature: Brace yourself for the attacks that are soon to come.

The other creature rapidly attacks you with his sharp object, which you defend yourself from while your health vial slowly decreases with each of his pitiful attacks. But little does he he know that you yourself have a sharp object of your own.

==> Creature: Counter attack.

You attempt to slash at the creature, and strike at it's arm, forcing it's HEALTH VIAL to decrease by 25%. Is it you or does the creature seem to have a look on his face that seems a bit more frightened than before?

==> Creature: Meet your end.

The creature sends off a barrage of attacks, in a fit of blind rage. You are easily overpowered by the unrelenting force, you are quickly killed. It seems as if paradox space does not have a place for someone as beautiful as you, it is the end of your story....

==> Orin: Rise up your ECHELADDER.

You rise up your ECHELADDER and leave the feeble "GREENTIKE" rung and are now at the "JUVENILE TODDLER" rung, you receive an increase in your MANGRIT, CACHE LIMIT, and GEL VISCOSITY as a result. You also get a couple of BOONDOLLARS for your troubles. Man, Dad would be so proud of you right now. You wonder where he is?

==> Get A Server- QUICK!!!

BA: Hey, MH?
BA: This may sound crazy but...
BA: Right uh...
BA: The game it uh...
BA: ...Transports you- it teleports you uh..
BA: And a meteor just fell by my house so...
BA: ...
BA: Oh damnit...
BA: I was playing that song earlier wasn't I...?
BA: 'It's the end of the world as we know it.'
BA: WELL GUESS WHAT- I DON'T FEEL FINE!
BA: NOT.
BA: AT.
BA: ALL!

You wish your dad was here, or maybe the butler... You call for the butler.

"BUTLER?!"

ME: Hey there sweeties!
ME: I was just wondering when you two are gunna hook up?
ME: In a purely client/server relationship of course.
ME: That would be really awkward.
ME: Hehe, silly me!
ME: So yeah you two lovelies should really hook up client-server and such!

AU: what is this
AU: this was not discussed
AU: please explain the relevance of this
AU: contact with lesser species
AU: should not be made
AU: unless permission has been given
ME: Oohhh! You know, it's funny, because guess what you are!
AU: what
ME: Irrelivant <3 ~ hehe!


ME: Do me a favour.
ME: If this guy tries to talk to any of you.
ME: Please ignore him!
ME: He's a waste of space!
BA: I will if you do the following.
BA: First, who are you?
BA: Second, who was that?
BA: Third how do you know me?
BA: Fourth, why do you want us to play so much?
BA: Fifth, what achievements are there?
BA: And sixth and final question.
BA: Is there a good story?
ME: Oohhhh! Of course! We don't know each other yet, do we!
ME: I'm such a silly sometimes }}(;P) Oh well!
ME: You and I are good friends in the future
ME: You'll meet me soon enough, as well as old Atlas, though I have a feeling you'll like him slightly less.
ME: He's got a good heart really, I think... I don't know if he really has one... Or whether it just sort of works... Anyway he just comes off, a bit... irrelivant <3~ Hehehe
ME: It would be cool if you could get in as quickly as possible because as you have discovered, getting in will teleport you away from those nasty meteors! So you don't die essentially, that would be no fun at all!
ME: Also the sooner you get in the sooner we can all meet up and become one big party! Even the Trolls, you'll really like them!
ME: After a while.
ME: Uhmmm, Acheivements are fun! You can always scale the Echeladder? That's fun, and if you get to the top there is 'God Tier', which I hear is amazing!
ME: And yes, sweetie, literally the best story I have played through. And it stars you guys! It was really fun to watch. I loved the bit where you did the important timey wimey shenanigans! They were so cute <3~

MH: i can do th- oh no
MH: nooo au go away ;-;
MH: oh yaya hes gone! :D
MH: anyway, yea! i can do that :>
ME: Awhh! Yaaay! I knew I could count on you sweetheart!
ME: Evan while your connecting up to that cutie Sara you think you could double task like the awesome dude you are and give Al-
ME: MH a hand too?
ME: Evan?
ME: Oh dear I guess he must be kinda busy!
ME: You humans are about to have such fun
ME: I guess while he's gone we could always talk about girly things?
ME: Like boys?
ME: Or guns?
ME: Or complain about AU?
ME: What A looser!!!
ME: He sure does smell funny! You wait untill you see him, he's really ugly! }}(:() He has no face or anything!
ME: Mabe we could look at cute pictures of cats together?
ME: http://legacy-cdn.smosh.com/smosh-pit/122010/ugly-cat-9.jpg
ME: Isn't it the cutest? <3~ hehe

==> Be The Butler

You cannot be the butler, not for a while at least...

==> Be Evan

No...

==> Well Be The Cuckoo Clock

You are now the Cuckoo Clock, oh dear what is this? ...The butler of this fine house is bringing a pumpkin out of the pantry... He seemed to proceed to OH GOD NO HE'S PUNCHING YOUR DOOR, YOU'RE GONNA DO IT- YOU KNOW YOU'RE GOING TO DO IT!!!

CUCKOO! .... CUCKOO!

...That was embarrassing, uh- you think you hear Master Chavos calling for the butler... You hope he doesn't hit you more...

==> Be The Flippin' Out Male

BA: YES!!!!
BA: HERE, HERE- THIS GUY NEEDS IT!
BA: I'VE SEEN WHAT BLUE-TEXT DID...
BA: JUST PLACE THE FREE STUFF IN MY ROOM!
BA: IT'S BIG ENOUGH, JUST PLEASE!
BA: ..I don't want to die...

==> Evan: Take A Screenshot of Sara

-- bankruptAuthor [BA] has sent the file 'We'regonnadie.png' --

The screenshot contained Sara's house in the medium.