The Paradise Session.

by **pankrationResolution** Fri Dec 06, 2013 3:17 pm

The ~~Paradise~~ Session.

(PM Bad John if you wanna participate. This is an open thing, so chances are, I won't turn ya down. It's gonna be pretty awesome.)

by **Cardly** Sat Dec 07, 2013 2:13 pm

==> Be The Angry Detective.

You are a teal blooded troll, at 7 sweeps of age you are hardly going to be of any use to anyone in this horrible land, however... You are just staring at that screen.... You notice that something has contacted you.

==> Detective: Look At File.

There appears to be a download link, along with some unreadable text. You are extremely FURIOUS at this moment in time and so inch your mouse closer to the download link.

CLICK!

You click the link, your browser freezes. After a while you eventually regain control, but it's so... So... SLOW!

==> Detective: Click Random Buttons.

You smash the buttons in a desperate attempt to vent out your anger and frustration at this download link.

IT'S NOT WOORKING!

==> Detective: Flip Your Shit.

You flip your shit, jumping out of your seat; you march over to a small painting of some lusus and rip it up. Sayanora goat-weasel.

==> Detective: Notice That The Download Link Has Finished Downloading.

Oh... It's finished... That's.. Good you guess? Oh well, I could it wouldn't hurt to try out what you just downloaded.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

It seemed like a simple flip-out to the young troll, but what he didn't notice was that he had sent the files to another species, one that does not even exist yet........ Using Crazy-Plot-Shit.

by **brokenEcho** Sat Dec 07, 2013 2:58 pm

==> Stop being the angry detective.
Done and done. You are now an impatient orange blooded troll girl who just so happened to have a conversation with the aforementioned detective not too long ago. You continued to stare at the colorful text on the screen until you were pretty certain that he wasn't going to reply any time soon. You just assume that he went off to throw a fit or something.
You don't have very many talents but the ones you have you consider yourself to be quite good at. You find yourself talented in digging and annoying the shit out of a certain teal blooded detective. Both of these you do quite often.

==> Acknowledge presence of a new file.
You don't have time to really do either of the two talents as a file pops up on your screen. Not wanting to waste time mulling over the possible dangers of the mysteriously appearing file, you simply download it. No mashing of the keys or any shit flipping otherwise.
...It seems to be taking its sweet time with the downloading process, so you'll just go off to dig for a while and give someone else the chance to introduce themselves.

by Guest Sat Dec 07, 2013 3:11 pm

> MEAN WHILE! ...In a far off universe.

you cough chokely.

> Comes to a house somewhere near a forest...

Ahem! You go.

> I'm getting to you! Hold on!

You shake your head at this.

> Is her.

Who? Oh right. You can't see.

> Open curtains.

You walk up to the curtains to thrash them open in an outwards motion far and wide, letting the- Oh holy! The light! It hurts!

> Dammit! Just introduce yourself!

You shield your eyes from the sunlight, stumbling backwards towards the center of the room. Now this is where all the real stuff happens.

> Enter name.

Selfless Puppet ✘

> Try again.

Jill Larnce. ✔

> Jill. Introduce yourself.

Your name is JILL LARNCE and you sometimes say your name in full. Coming out as JILL SETH LARNCE. Where on earth did SETH came from you say? Well it came from when your brothers named you since a very young age. But carrying on... Your hobbies involve DRAWING, to the finest detail and THINKING. This thinkness is something you admit you do a lot lately. But you ignore others that would complain about it. Your MODUS is MOODY, meaning what ever certain feeling / mood your in can eject everything in that certain compartment area. Lastly, Your STIFE ABSTRATUS is SWORD/BLADEKIND. Did I say that was all? Nah. The last thing to mention is that your a HUMAN!

At the moment, it seems she is retreating to her computer, away form the suns rays. You seriously need to get out more, so you say to yourself. But either all. You sit down on the computer chair and begin fondling around with the computer. In this 'fondling.' you set yourself ONLINE on PESTERCHUM. To tell your friends that your online. After this! You quickly start browsing the interwebs for useless information.

> Jill. Be someone else.

by **pankrationResolution** Sat Dec 07, 2013 3:36 pm

==> Be someone else.

In the center of a small room, a young man lays on the floor, legs crossed. He taps away at a small Game-Boy, playing Dungeon-Crawlers 3. He sports a dark brown jeep cap, and a pair of stylish glasses, and dark blue boot cut jeans. His shirt has no sleeves, sporting his GUNS. His guns are his arms. Plus, it's hot sorta HOT where he lives. He likes warm weather.

==> Enter Name.

Doofus Hattingshire.

==> Fuck off with that.

Jomm Kyova.

==> Introduce the guy.

Your name is JOMM KYOVA and you're a pretty cool dude. You're an average sized AFRICAN AMERICAN, you enjoy Karate, Adventure, Daydreaming, and Videogames. You're not very flexible, and you love RC COLA.

==> This game sucks. Go get your backpack.

The young man activates his backpack, his FETCH MODUS of choice. The brown bag blooms into a small gallery of options, including books, snacks, first aid, and his games and music album. It pretty much lets him grab whatever he wants, since you got tired of the constant bullshit of launching stuff around by accident, and sorting through stuff.

Jomm grabs a new game, Alien Laserfight. Clearly the manliest of entertainment. Sitting cross legged on the floor, he pop the game into his gameboy and prepare to continue.

A LOUD NOISE OCCURS.

==> OH SNAP!! OVERREACT!!

Jomm turns, and with a flick of his wrist, snatches his STRIFE SPECIBI from his backpack. It's the Family Sword, Bonny. A Han Dynasty Jian, its silver blade gleams proudly in the sunlight, as he faces the originator of the loud noise.

It was a bird hitting Jomm's window.

Jomm puts his sword away, groaning. "UUUUUUGH. For fuck's sake. Stupidass bird smudged my window."

Jomm slumps back onto the floor and continues his game. Little did he know, his laptop, currently in his backpack, had gotten a new file through the internet, sent by a disgruntled Gumshoe from entirely different section of Paradox Space.

==> Pass the buck to someone else.

by Guest Sat Dec 07, 2013 3:58 pm

> You know have the buck. Wait who are you again?

Well ofcourse your Jill! Have you already forgotten?

> Maybe... Jill. Make memo.

You begin to set up a memo that's set to open for all. Naming it... Hm... What you name it. You know! Maybe this song! 'Its the end of the end of the world as we know it.'

> Jill. Respond to your memo.

DS: Now I know I might be getting impatient.
DS: But someone needs to start to reply before I start singing.
DS: D:

> Jill. Be the other person.

by **Dissypoo** Sat Dec 07, 2013 4:24 pm

> Be the other person.

You've never been anyone else, and you think that's a ridiculous notion and don't have time for it. You'd be fixin' to send anyone who says otherwise to manure cleaning duty.

> Enter name.

HILLBILLY BUMPKIN.

A lasso wraps around the name suggestion and yanks it down, leaving an open space for the new suggestion.

> Enter the right name.

DALLAS CURTIS.

> Introduce yourself!

Your name is DALLAS CURTIS, but everyone calls you DALLY. You like it like that. You enjoy HONEST HARDWORK and your family RANCH, run by your Grandpappy. You have your own HORSE named DEPUTY, and you've just gotten back from grooming him after a day of HORSEBACK RIDING. You are sweaty and dirty and ready to CLEAN UP.

But first things first, your computer is trying to alert you to something.

> Investigate!

You wander over to your computer, wiping your hands off on your overalls before leaning over to see what's on the screen. Pesterchum is up and near the side, and in the middle of the screen is a request to download a file. You don't really pay attention to it as you get requests to update things all the time, and you accept the file and let it download.

With that done, you get out a clean set of clothes and head into your bathroom to shower.

> Give someone else a chance in the saddle.

by **Cardly** Sat Dec 07, 2013 4:53 pm

==> Be The... 'Less Angry' Detective.

You are the Detective again. Fortunately for you, you have finally calmed down. Now, maybe it's time to get to know this troll more?

==> Name The Detective.

Problem Sleuth.

The Detective looks at you. As much as he is flattered, this is not his real name. He merely points at a sign on the wall. It reads:

NAKURD STURMTH.

Oh; he actually had a name. This is nice.

==> Detective: Captchalog Orange Creamsicles.

You captchalog the Orange Creamsicles using your EVIDENCE-PAD Modus. To bring these delicious treats out you will merely have to rub out the sketch of it that you just drew. Huh, something odd is going on with your computer... Check it out will ye?

==> Detective: Check Computer.

You seem to be seeing something odd, you see darkness; but there's some form of menu screen in the top left. You wonder what to do... Hmm, you have 20 of something called... 'grist' you guess you could just... Place this.. What's it called again? Oh yes, the Cruxtruder.

==> Detective: Place Heavy Cruxtruder.

by **brokenEcho** Sat Dec 07, 2013 5:22 pm

==> Back to the orange ~~creamsicle~~ blooded troll girl.
You just now returned from digging only to see a large machine in the middle of your respiteblock. You have no clue how it even got here, but you would just love to hear the explanation for this nonsense.

==> Before you can pin the blame on a certain someone, let's actually find out who you even are. Enter name:
Snarky Hypocrite.
You glare coldly at the rather offensive name, ~~even though it's completely accurate.~~

==> Enter name:
Kaphin Svalom.
Yes, that's much better, you think.

==> Now you can pin the blame on a certain someone.
-- translucentGemstone [TG] began trolling nubbySleuth [NS] --
TG: you didnt happen to get some sort of mysterious file did you
TG: just as>ing be>ause
TG: hey
TG: loo> at that
TG: theres a fuc>ing giant machine in the middle of my damn respiteblock

by **Cardly** Sat Dec 07, 2013 5:25 pm

==> Be The Detective Once More.

NS: Why yes, ! d!d.
NS: ! assume you also got !t?
NS: And downloaded !t?
NS: T'would expla!n a lot...

by **pankrationResolution** Sat Dec 07, 2013 5:37 pm

==> Jomm, get your laptop.

Having already gotten bored of playing videogames, Jomm stuffed his gameboy into his Sylladex. At that point, he noticed his laptop had two alerts.

Fishing it out, he opened it up and gave it a quick look.

DS: Now I know I might be getting impatient.
DS: But someone needs to start to reply before I start singing.
DS: D:

Jill was trying to get her attention on Pesterchum. Jomm shrugged, and looked at the second thing. A file trying to make its way onto his noble laptop. Sgrub, it was called. Jomm opened the full message, trying to see who had sent it to him and why.

Spoiler:

"Alright, frigginnuts to that." No idea what that is. Jomm clicks download, and sets his laptop aside, grabbing his Palm Pilot, and responding to Jill.

boldedRockerbye [BR] responded to Memo.

BR: Whatup, Jill? d:]
BR: A bird just skullbashed my window. Notexactly the coolest thingever. I have no idea how I'mgonna clean a thirdfloor window from the outside. d:[

by **brokenEcho** Sat Dec 07, 2013 5:38 pm

TG: yes and yes
TG: but
TG: how did you even get the machine in here
TG: what weird-ass file just lets someone do that
TG: let me guess
TG: you just decided
TG: "oh hey th!s looks l!ke a n!ce place to put down a huge mach!ne for no apparent reason herp derp"
TG: or something along those lines
TG: because honestly i would not expe>t you to thin> in any other way

by **Cardly** Sat Dec 07, 2013 5:43 pm

NS: !'m go!ng to be honest.
NS: ! can't see a th!ng.
NS: So ! just plopped !t by there.
NS: !n the menu !t looked l!ke there was some form of l!d on !t.
NS: Why not try open!ng !t?

You have your suspicions about this game, maybe it's some form of training program developed by the highbloods to test those that are lower on the hemospectrum...

by Guest Sat Dec 07, 2013 5:51 pm

> Jill. Reply to your memo.

DS: A bird.
DS: Jezz.
DS: Maybe make some long stick like pole and knock it off the edge?
DS: That is what I would do.
DS: Is it profoundly dead?
DS: A fledgling maybe?
DS: I feel sorry for them little babies.
DS: Try so hard to fly.
DS: Just makes me want to hold them.

> Jill. Reflect on your prophetic life.

No! You will not! Get out of her at once!

> Jill. Be some other person again?

by **pankrationResolution** Sat Dec 07, 2013 6:05 pm

==>Jomm, conversationalize.

BR: He's not stuck on the window, just his blood and brains. It's prettydamn macabre if you ask me. dx[
BR: You get a weirdassemail with a file attached to it? I did. I'm downloadin' the file now on my compy.

==> Jomm notice email.

Jomm turned towards his computer as it chirped, signalling an email. Against his better judgement, he clicked it, and was greeted by another wall of green, underline binary stuff. This time, the text was slightly larger, and felt a lot more disconcerting, despite the language barrier.

Spoiler:

"Ohfortheloveof..." Jomm papped his hand against his forehead. "I can't READ THIS you DUMBASS!"

Jomm blocked the mail address, and turned back to his compy.

BR: The goon who sent me thefile keeps sending me 1s and 0s.
BR: You getting any weirdcrap like this? I'm prettymuch annoyed after only two messages from the dork.

by **brokenEcho** Sat Dec 07, 2013 6:12 pm

TG: maybe i >an find a way to ma>e some light in here
TG: even though i >an already see just fine
TG: the fact that you >ant s>ares me
TG: be>ause honestly i dont feel like being >rushed by some random machine in my own hive today
TG: because of some idiot who >ant even see what hes doing

==> Kaphin: Examine the machine.
This.. is accomplishing absolutely nothing, merely staring at it.

==> Hit it with your shovel.
Gladly, you proceed to do so. You also manage to pop the cap-looking-thingy off of it. An orange kernelsprite pops right out of it.

TG: i think i found our light source for now
TG: i have no idea what this glowing thing even is though

by **avidBowmaster** Sat Dec 07, 2013 6:15 pm

==> BE ORFEUS

Who's Orfeus

==> You, dumbass

Oh. Okay.

==> Orfeus: Introduce self

A 7.5 Sweep old troll, swaggy as hell, sits in his respiteblock. His name is Orfeus Castor. He is a violet blood, but hayes living in the ocean, because sea dwellers are assholes. He lives on the beach in a mansion like Hive. His interest are watching movies.

==> Orfeus: Respond to memo

AB: Helllooooo
AB: How is everyone?

by **Cardly** Sat Dec 07, 2013 6:19 pm

NS: Well, !'m go!ng to see !f....
NS: Actually, can you see my h!ve on your screen?
NS: !f you can? Don't try any funny bus!ness..
NS: ! can mess yours up too...

==> Detective: Look At Memo.

-- nubbySleuth [NS] Has Replied To Memo --

NS: Hey man, whatever you do...
NS: Do not download that f!le...
NS: ! got a bad feel!ng about !t...
NS: Detect!ve... OUT!

by **bluefire31** Sat Dec 07, 2013 6:25 pm

==> Be loner troll

"Go away."

Well then.

==> Just log onto something.

The troll opens an application on her computer. It was her monthly check up with the application.

- forgoneSilence is now online. -

A memo appeared!

- forgoneSilence began responding to memo -

FS: What is it.

by **avidBowmaster** Sat Dec 07, 2013 6:26 pm

==>

AB: Dont download the file?
AB: What File?

Orfeus looks through the memo, and clicks the file.

==> Orfeus: Ooops

AB: Welp.
AB: I accidentally clicked the file.

by **Cardly** Sat Dec 07, 2013 6:29 pm

==> Sigh. Explain To These Fools.

NS: You see, !'ve been able to... Spawn th!ngs out of nowhere us!ng someth!ng called gr!st... We could be culled for th!s...

==> Look Back At Trollian.

by **bluefire31** Sat Dec 07, 2013 6:31 pm

FS: Then why play.
FS: If you think that you may be killed, and you fear that, then why play.
FS: It is as simple as deleting a file.
FS: No more, no less.

==> Look at file.

You usually do not care.

Why should you really?

You download the game.

by **avidBowmaster** Sat Dec 07, 2013 6:33 pm

==> Who is this FS character?

WELL YOU DONT FUCKIN KNOW

==> Okay...

AB: The file is downloading
AB: Has anyone else downloaded it yet?

by **brokenEcho** Sat Dec 07, 2013 6:33 pm

TG: no i >ant see it
TG: and i dont really >are to
TG: your hive is probably more of a mess than mine is
TG: and thats fuc>ing saying something

==> Throw your shovel at the glowy thingy
You don't really want to. You have no reason to do so anyway.

==> You just have to ask...

TG: youre literally just sitting there with another one of those disgusting orange >reamsi>les in your mouth arent you
TG: just sitting there
TG: and >ontinuing to fatten yourself up

by **Cardly** Sat Dec 07, 2013 6:38 pm

==> Detective: Mess With Hive.

NS: Oh?

==> Detective: Mess With Things.

[color=#339966]
NS: Oh... !s that what ! th!nk !t !s?
NS: ! th!nk !t !s....
NS: Yes, !t's the sound of every l!v!ng part of your small !nsecure mind cry!ng out for attent!on.... BUCK UP, SHUT... Up and l!sten, ! th!nk th!s !s ser!ous... You know what? !'m go!ng to tell that sea-dweller to help me w!th th!s....[/color

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