Hivejacked

===> Be the polar dweller

Alternia is Ending.
The sky is torn by the trails of a thousand meteor’s, slamming into the ground like the burning fists of a raging, idiot god.

Great clouds of steam are boiling into the sky as the snow melts under the heat of the rocks. It’s an oddly pretty sight that almost distracts you from the knowledge that the world is ending.

The Alchemiter pings softly as it materializes the object you’ve been assured is your method of escaping this apocalypse, hopefully you can figure out what to do with it before your hive is flattened by several tons of flaming rock…


===> (this means im done and its your turn to do the thing)

“Well. That’s kind of unfortunate.” He mumbled to himself, the waddlebeasts gathering around his feet as he picked up the strange alchemized object of some description. “Lets see what we’re working with before I get a mental breakdown or something, right Peepers?” He asked one of the flightless avians, who merely “C/-\Wed” in response.

====> Ozeath: Try to block out the terrible events happening above you and focus!

Looking at the alchemitizer, you see what appears to be three balls of snow lined up biggest to smallest, the smallest ball has several indentation on it that resemble a smiling face.

===> Ozeath: Woah. Snowball fight?

“Oh! Alright. Hm. Let’s do this then!” The blueblood went over, picked up the largest ball, and promptly placed it on the bottom stack, followed by the second largest ball with the smallest ball on top. "So, we have to make a snow devil? Neat." He said cheerfully, maybe Ragnarok wasn't all bad! "Alright guys!" He said, turning to the surrounding Waddlebeasts, almost seventy of the little guys, and gave them their orders, "I'm gonna need three knives and a lot of coins!" He called out, receiving a absolutely terrifying canopy of "C/-\W" in return. The terror of the waddlebeasts seemed to have been mitigated by Ozeath's optimism. After all, this was their way out, right? Several minutes went by before they returned with his supplies, and while some might be afeared when tiny birds charge at them carrying sharp pieces of metal, to Ozeath it was all fairly pedestrian. Taking the knives, he stuck one handle first into where the Snow Devil’s nose would be, and putting the other two handle down on top of its head to simulate horns.

“Lookin’ sharp, buddy!” He snickered to himself, placing the brass coins he had looted from FLARPer corpses over the sweeps in as eyes(making sure to place them heads first, as per tradition) and taking a deep breath. He cut his thumb on the nose-knife, drawing a bead of blue blood he spread across where the snow devil’s mouth would be, giving him a gash that looked almost like a smile.

“With my blood, I give you life! With my voice, I christen you Snowzeath!”

As your insane ritual comes to a close, your hive erupts with a blinding light that builds quickly. Just before the light blots out everything else you see one of the meteors change direction suddenly and skim across the ground, slamming into the side of your hive just as it all goes white.

After a few seconds of blinding white the light fades away revealing… the same damn landscape you where just looking at.. Except minus the meteors and quakes.. Actually thinking about it it’s more likely to be a totally different blank snowy waste, they all do kinda look the same.

The squakbeast’s begin milling around squawking as they are want to do, other then that all is silence.

===> Ozeath: Celebrate.

“It’s so beautiful!” He coo’d, picking up one of the Waddlebeasts, Milly this time, and spinning her around in his arms as he dances across the snow, enjoying this new, meteor-free winter wonderland.

“Everything is going to go cool from here on out!” He sighed, happy that whole thing even worked.

After a few seconds of dancing, he dropped Milly. He should probably message someone and tell them he made it in alright, huh?

Checking pesterchum you see most of your contacts are still available, but the only one that online right now is Trikeo

Perfect! The only one he was planning on telling. Right now, at least.

====> Ozeath: Message the pleb.
[SS] stitchedSnowman has begun trolling [TA]transientAdulator
SS: Y()! Guess wh() isn’t dead!
TA: you ok! Oh thank jebush.. i think i killed the world..
SS: Well, n()thing we c/-\n re/-\lly d() /-\b()ut it n()w huh?
SS: Besides it c()uld be /-\ c()incidence! =:)
SS: /-\nd yes I’m very ()kay! I’m in /-\ less terrible winter w()nderland
TA: oh, shnap me too, theresh like thish foresht with shnow everywhere and these holesh with dirt in them.. Itsh kinda creepy in a preety way.
SS: I’ve never been t() a f()rest bef()re, maybe we’re near ()ne /-\n()ther! We b()th have sn()w!
SS: What’s creepy /-\b()ut dirt in holes? /-\re y()u c()ld? D:=
TA: a little, itsh creepy caushe itsh sho quiet here, like shilent..shpoopy and shuch.
SS: Hm, pr()bably quiet f()r /-\ reas()n! Luckily y()u kn()w h()w t() blend in! =;)
SS: S() whats the plan? What d() we d() n()w?
TA: the guide i found shaid we have queshts and thingsh we need to do to fix the messh i made..
TA: sho i think we need to explore.
SS: Guide? We get /-\ guide? Where /-\re they?
SS: THIS IS /-\N EXPL()RATI()N GAME? =:D
SS: /-\LRIGHT!
TA: i found it on the hushktop where i found the game, itsh a little odd, written like a fan fiction to like shix different trollsh sho.. Getting throuhg it ish gonna take me shome time…
SS: What has it said s() far?
TA: moshtly, twenty pagesh of waffeling about wizardsh
SS: That’s silly, magic isn’t real!
SS: Aw well. Y()u study that and I’ll see what I can find in this beautiful fr()zen wasteland!
SS: S()und g()()d?
TA: shure thing, ill try and get in contact with the othersh, make shure there not...corpshesh..
TA: pleashe shaty alive
SS: Pssh, remember wh() y()u’re talking t()()!
SS: ()zeath Cyr()()s, master hunter and juni()r Deadnaught. I’m pr()bably the scariest thing in this wasteland!
SS: We’ll be fine! =:)
TA: you once got yourshelf shtuck to a iceberg caushe you wanted to shee what it tashted like.. Forgive my fearsh
SS: IT WAS /-\ WEIRD C()LOR I WANTED T() CHECK!

Alternia is ending.
Meteors pound the earth like the hands of a angry god, in the distance great clouds of steam rise as the sea boils and all around your hive fire and death reign.
All in all, youre very glad to be leaving.

You turn and examine the item your alchemitizer has produced for you, it looks for all the world like a crystalline bike horn…

===>

Very glad indeed. You had absolutely no plan to be consumed by the blazing inferno around your hive. However, there still is this strange item… It looks vaguely familiar but you can’t quite put your phalange on it. You gently pick it up, as it seems so fragile that your large, clumsy hands would easily break it, although the weight is rather much for what it looks like, and it feels like no matter how hard you tried to break it, there wouldn’t even be a hairline fracture. You turn it over in your hands for a few moments, carefully analyzing it, but you still can’t make any sense of it. With a sigh, you placer it down and attempt to recollect your thoughts and focus.

===>

No matter how hard you try you cant clear your thoughts of that strange object, its silent stillness almost seems to be mocking you as it sits there gleaming, turning away for a moment you notice one of the meteors heading straight towards your hive, you dont think you have long left to figure this stupid thing out..

===>

You proceed to freak the fuck out for a moment, looking around wildly for some sort of answer. Somehow, in all the panic, your mind finally realizes what it is: A horn of some sort used for honking. Curiosity gets the better of you and you pick the mysterious object back up and hesitantly squeeze the round end.

===>

Your cautious squeezing produces a quiet, almost apologetic Honk.
You feel a little guilty for forcing the innocent horn to exclaim such a pathetic noise, but only a little.
As soon as the honk fades your hive is bathed in a searing white glow, seeming to come from the stone itself, you try to cover your eyes from the glare but it seems to shine straight through your hands.

Just before the glow consumes everything you feel a thump run through your hive, like something very heavy had been dropped near by, then the world goes silent as the glow snaps off like a switch had been thrown somewhere.

===>

Your eyes take a short while to readjust and begin to recognize basic shapes. Once the blur is mostly gone, you rub your sightspheres and attempt to figure out just what that large thud was. But your mind is still stuck on what the light was for, and you contemplate if both are related or not, taking more time like the incompetent dunderfuck you are. Considering that the thud could be something potentially dangerous, you hustle your ass to your room and grab your piss-old rifle that barely even works anymore. You then begin examining your hive for any extensive damage that already wasn’t there ((You tend to punch and headbutt walls when angry.)) Luckily, there didn’t seem to be much, although your pile of broken glass in the corner of your room was shifted everywhere. Probably not a good idea to constantly have to break glass to get items, but hey, the sound soothes you.

===>

As you move through the hive you find nearly everything as you left it, however when you reach the entrance hallway you find something...Odd..

Jutting from the wall, having apparently punched through it, is some..Thing.. It looks like a long thin claw or spike covered in teeth and eyes, a cautious tap reveals that these are merely decoration for a entirely metal device, it looks like nothing youve seen before though, its design is totaly alien to you..

===>

You stop for a moment, frozen in fear. Like pretty much everything that just transpired, you have no idea what is going on or what to do. Fortunately the.. What ever it is dosent take advantage of your fear. It just Sits there looking menacing. You cautiously raise your rifle and take a potshot at it, unsure of how it was going to respond. Not angrily, you hoped. When other things or people are angry, you usually get angry, and then you’re not a very pleasant person to be around.

===>

You bullet stops mid air with a flash of green light that crackles over the spike, with a loud crack the outer casing splits in half, disgorging several small devices that rapidly begin to bury themselves into your hive, tunneling downwards as fast as they can.
After a few seconds the machines have vanished from view entirely, only the holes in the floor and the casing left to show they where ever there. As you stand there somewhat nonplussed you hear the faint chime of your husktop announcing a new email.

===>

Taking a few moments to assess the situation to the best of your ability, you decide to leave it be for now --- after all, what’s the worst that could happen? Oh, wait, a lot of things. Your mind swiftly flashes these things for you as you scuttle that ass upstairs to the best of your ability, tripping twice and tearing flesh open once, leaving a small purple stain on one of the stairs. And this is why you don’t run. Either way, you finally get to your respiteblock and sit down at your husktop, opening the message.

===>

==transientAdulator began trolling intravenousExtravaganza==

TA: pleashebeokpleashebeokpleashebeok
IE: i tripped and started bleeding a little but other than that i’m fine
IE: well other than having absolutely no fucking idea what just happened
TA:i think i ended the world
IE: i’d try to comfort you but like i said i have no idea what just happened
IE: at the very least i’m still alive so that’s a plus (i guess)
TA: it looksh like alot of what i thought wash ic rp from the write of the guide i found ish actualy 100% literal, the game blew up the world and now were in shomething called the medium making a new univershe.. i think.
IE: well that’s one hell of a game i guess
IE: now’s probably not the time to be cracking jokes sorry
TA: i have no idea whatsh true in thish thing, half of it ish wizard fanfiction and the other half ish in the mosht needlushly complex wording ive ever sheen.. And you dont need to appologishe im the one who shcrewed everything up for everyone..
IE: a: don’t beat yourself up about it and b: for all we know everyone, or at least some people managed to get it out
IE: but at the same time, that whole half-wizard fanfiction thing, are you sure you can’t discern anything from it?
TA: it’sh hard to read but there ish alot of info about whatsh goin on in there, looking at it i think it wash copied from like five other placesh, the shtory bitsh dont match up like they should. According to thish we have to go and explore the planetsh we ended up on, you did end up on a planet didnt you?
IE: i don’t know
IE: i haven’t been outside my hive yet
IE: something busted into it and when i shot it the bullet didn’t even get there and these little tiny machine-y things started burrowing into my hive so i’ve mostly been worried about what that’ll do
TA: wash the thing that hit your hive like a big glob of gutsh and teeth, but made of metal? Caushe thatsh what broke into mine. Itsh hooked itshelf up to my power linesh and im afraid to touch it..
IE: kind of but it looked like one giant sharp tooth with a bunch of teeth attached to it
IE: i tapped mine and it was alright-ish
IE: it didn’t freak out or do anything at least that i could see
TA: theresh no mention of anything like theshe thingsh in the guide.. Now that i think about it my trollnet signal is better then itsh ever been, itsh running at like.. Whoa. it saysh here my connection ish running at a terrabyte per milishecond shpeed..
IE: a terrabyte per millisecond?
IE: that’s fucking wicked sick
TA: shame the entire trollnet ish gone.. Nothing to download. Damn it thish stupid thing ish auto correcting my quirk away! I thought that wash illigal!
IE: but if the trollnet’s gone then how the FUCK are we talking to one another
TA: thatsh..a good point actually… shomething here musht be providing a shignal..
IE: alright well
IE: let’s worry about that later
IE: right about now we should probably figure out who all is still alive and their condition and how the hell to get out of this “medium” thing
TA: ozeath ish shtill alive, i talked to him jusht before i shaw you come online, not shure about carrol..
IE: this probably sounds like the worst option but
IE: you should check on carrol and i’ll try to figure something out with the whole giant metal thing
TA: ok, be careful ill be here if you need me.
IE: alright
IE: i’d say the same but i’m gonna be away for a bit
TA: ok,ill go explora bit then, ill have my hushktop with me sho ill be contactable. Good luck.

==Transient Adulator has ceased trolling intravenousExtravaganza==