Scrub (or, Literally The Worst Session)

THIS DUDE RIGHT HERE IS JIMBESON STRIVANTASDER-EGBERT. HE IS A SWAGGIN DUDE. HIS MOTHER IS DAVE, WHO IS ALSO JOHN EGBERT'S DAD AND HIS OTHER MOTHER IS KARKAT. JIMBESON IS A KISS-ME-CIS BABBY FROM BUCKETS. HE IS HALF TROLL, HALF HUMAN, HALF TELLYTUBBY, AND HALF SWAG. HIS BROTHER IS JOHN EGBERT. THE BEST CHERUB IS TEREZI. THE TEREZI THING HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH JIMBESON AT ALL, BUT SHE IS STILL PRETTY AMAZING AMIRITE. HIS DUMB AS HELL INTERESTS INCLUDE IRONY, SAYING FUCKASS, WEARING HATS, PUTTING HOES IN THEIR PLACE, AND HAVING SWAG IN GENERAL. HE HAS ALSO GODTIERED FIVE TIMES AS THE LORD OF SWAG. TODAY IS NOT HIS BIRTHDAY, BECAUSE THAT WOULD BE A COINCIDENCE AND COINCIDENCES ARE STUPID. FUNNILY ENOUGH, HIS BIRTHDAY IS TOMORROW. IF YOU LOOK AROUND HIS ROOM YOU WILL FIND NOTHING. THERE IS NOTHING IN HIS ROOM AT ALL. NOT EVEN DOORS.

HE OPENS UP PESTERCHUM.

8===> BE ANOTHER PERSON OR SOMETHIN.

THIS AMAZING AS HECK GIRL'S NAME IS RONAYDEXY LALOARYARLEY. SHE IS THE MOST PRETTIEST GIRL TO LIVE BECAUSE SHE IS HALF TROLL,HALF HUMAN, HALF CHERUB AND HALF CARAPACIAN. SHE HAS PURPLE-ISH, JADE GREEN-ISH-PINKISH EYES BECAUSE OF ALL THE DIFFERENT BLOODS IN HER WHICH ARE PINK, PURPLE AND LIME-GREEN MIXED TOGETHER. HER PARENTS ARE ROXY, KANAYA AND JAKE. BECAUSE KANAYA IS ONE OF HER MOTHERS SHE IS HALF-SIBLINGS WITH PORRIM MEANING SHE IS LIKE LOADS OF YEARS OLDER THAN ALL OF THEM. SHE IS THE MUSE OF PRETTINESS AND HAS DOMINATED ALL THE LANDS OF ALL THE SBURB/SCRUB PLAYERS BECAUSE OF HER AMAZING PRETTINESS.
HER ROOM IS ALL WHITE BECAUSE WHITE IS BEAUTIFUL LIKE HER AND SHE ONLY HAS A PORTRAIT OF HER MOMS AND HER UNCLES IN HER ROOM BECAUSE THAT IS THE ONLY THING YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT HER BACKGROUND.

SHE NOW GOES ONTO PESTERCHUM


8=======>BE SOMEONE ELSE NOW BECAUSE WHY NOT

8======> Join this topic despite not asking at all.

YOU NAME IS DRAVSPRITE LILDRIK. TODAY IS YOUR 19TH BIRTHdAY AND YOU ARE ABOUT TO PLAY A GAME WITH PEOPLE YOU KNOW BUT THEY DON'T KNOW WHAT THE GAME IS YET BECAUSE YOU HaVE WOKEN UP ON BOTH PROSPIT AND DERSE SIMULTANEOUSLY WHILE THEY HAVE DIFFIDENTLY NOT. YOU ARE A TROLL WITH RARE SILVER bLOOD THAT MAKES YOU RESISTANT TO ALL DISEASES, FIRE HAZARDS AND DISMEMBERING BUT YOU ARE STILL VULNERABLE TO COOL SCARS FORMING ON YOUR FACE. YOU HAVE SUFFERED MORE THAN ANYONE THAT HAS EVER LIVED, HAVING A RARE MIXTURE OF DEPRESSION, SCHIZOPHRENIA, OCD AND BI-POLAR SYNDROME. HOwEVER DESPITE THINk YOU ARE STILL REALLY COOL AND PEOPLE ALSO LIKE YOU ALMOST IMMEDIATELY. YOU ARE KNOWN TO INSTANTLY STEAL AWAY JOCK'S GIRLFRIENDS BECAUSE OF HOW mYSTERIOUS AND TROUBLED YOU ARE. YOUR GOD-TIER IS MISUNDERSTOOD HERO OF TIME AND SPACE AND DOOM. PEOPLE JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND.

GO ON PESTERCHUM SHIT-BULGE

8=========> bE SOMENE ELSE ALREADY, jEEZ!

{for future reference, there is no post order either}

JIMBESON USES HIS SWAGLORD POWERS TO CREATE A COMPUTER THAT LOOKS LIKE THE GUY NAMED BILL FROM THE COSBY SHOW AND HE CALLS IT A GUY-NAMED-BILL-FROM-THE-COSBY-SHOW-TOP, BECAUSE THAT IS WHAT ALL THE COOL PEOPLE CALL IT AND NORMALLY HE USES IRONY TO CALL STUFF DIFFERENT, BUT HE DID A DOUBLE IRONY. HE THEN CHATS WITH THE OLD HO AND THE OTHER ONE. ALSO HIS BLOOD COLOR IS A SWAGICAL ONE. THE BLOOD ON THE LEFT SIDE OF HIS BODY IS WHITE AND THE BLOOD ON THE LEFT SIDE OF HIS BODY IS BLACK. SOMETIMES WHEN HE IS HAPPY OR UPSET HIS BLOOD TURNS HOT PINK. IT ALSO TURNS PINK WHEN HE IS BORED. NOW THE CHAT WITH THE OTHER LOSERS.

JIMBESONSTRIVANTASDEREGBERT:OLLEHSRESOL.

==> Be Dave

The Striders are to cool for this session.

==> Be the closes thing

You are now the 36th reincarnation of The Doctor, people call you the "The Doctroll" even if you are not a troll, they call you like that because you are an asshole.

You are currently in the Tardis. The machine that can travel trough time and space. Thats cheating could a lot of people say. You say you dont care, because you are indeed. an asshole

==> Cheat destiny to met someone

you travel in space and time and the tardis ends up in the room of someone. you have no means to know Who's room is so you deside to do the logical thing to do. And write "The Doctor" in the wall, just to be clear that you were there

SHE GOES ONTO PESTERCHUM AND SEES THAT THE WEIRDLY SWAGGY KID JIMBESONSTRIVANTASDEREGBERT IS ONLINE. SHE FLIPS HER HAIR LIKE THE FABULOUS GIRL SHE IS AND REPLIES, TYPING IN HER EXTREMELY FABULOUS QUIRK WHICH FITS SUCH A BEAUTIFUL BEING SUCH AS HER

RONAYDEXYLALOARYARLEY: OHMIGOSHSHOG.rmSTVRIVASNTSA, gerato meteYUO toyad! *filsp hira*

(i din read n e posts that k?)


A YOUNG CARCAT STANDS IN HIS RESPITBLOCK WHAT WILL THE NAME OF THIS YUNG TROL BEE

CARACAT

YES YOU ARE CARCAT AND YOU ARE PROBABLY THE BEST AWESOME PERSON EVER BECAUSE DESPINTE AND MAYBEE BECAUSE OF YOUR LOVE OF THE WORD FUC K
YOU ARE SHORT AND SORT OF TALL BUT ALSO VERY HANDSOME BUT NOT TO GUYS AND ONLY TO BYUTIFUL PEOPLE TOO
YOU BASICALLY HAVE ALL THE GIRLS AND ARE SUPR SMART AND ALSO AWESOME GOOD WITH CUMPEUTERS
YOU JUST GOT YOUR MAIL IN AND IT IS THE NEW GAME SCRUB YOU ARE GOING TO PLAY IT WITH YOUR BYUTIFUL FEMALE FRIENDS WHO ALSO LOVE YOU.

ELSEWERE ON THE MOON A BOLING BALL HEADED MAN IS LAUGHING BECAUSE HE IS STOOPED

=[]:::::::::> BE THE GORJUS FUC KER AGAIN HE IS AWESOME AND THE BEST ALSO

YOU ARE AGAIN THE GORJUS FUC KER AND YOU ARE ON TROLEAN TO YELL AND SAY FUC K A LOT AND ALSO GET DATES YOU ARE USING YOUR FONE

Show Stupiditylog:

(i will not translate unles u beg mi)

8====================================================================================================================================================================================================================================================================================================================================================================================================================================> BE THE KING OF SWAG.

HE IS THE LORD OF SWAG AND YOU CAN'T BE HIM. HE IS HIS OWN PERSON THAT YOU CANNOT BE. YOU CAN'T JUST GO AROUND BEING PEOPLE. THAT IS JUST RUDE. YOU GOTTA ASK TO BE PEOPLE.

======================================================================================================================================================> CAN I BE YOU STRIVANTASDER-SENPAI?! CAN I HAVE THE BEING OF YOU

JIMBESON: SEY, ESAELP EB EM. ESAELP EB EM DRAH. I DEEN UOY OT EB EM THGIR WON NAM.

YOU BE JIMBESON AND HE IS SMILING AND SWAGICAL RIGHT NOW. HE IS SO SWAGTASTICALLY SWAGICAL THAT HE HAS GODTIERED 13,337 MORE TIMES. OH AND THAT'S LIKE OVER NINE THOUSAND SO HE IS NOW SUPER SAIYAN. HIS ROLL IS NOW SUPER SAIYAN OF SWAG AND THAT MEANS LRD ENGLISH IS NOW DOUBLE DEAD TO DEATH AND THAT ALSO MAKES JIMBESON INTO LRD JAPANESE AND HE IS ALL COOL AND ALL. AND HE IS SO POWERFUL AND SWAG NOW. ALL AT ONCE, EVERYBODY BOWS TO HIM UNLESS THEY DON'T FEEL LIKE IT.

EITHER WAY, RIGHT NOW HE IS SO BAD ASS AND STUFF. LIKE HE JUST DROPPED 5 STRAWS AND WAS ABLE TO COUNT IT. YEAH, HE IS NOW MORE BADASS THAN CHUCK NORRIS AND THE INCREDIBLE HULK COMBINED. HE IS LIKE OUR NEW GOD OR SOMETHING. HIS BLOOD EVEN TURNED SUPER SAIYAN. THAT IS HOW BAD ASS.

xxxSUPERSAIYANIFIEDJIMBESONSTRIVANTASDEREGBERT420SWAGxxxAKALRDJAPANESE: I MA WN REPUS NAYIAS DNA LC.

8========================================================> NOW THAT'S ENOUGH OF SUCH AWESOME SWAG FROM THE SWAGGY STRIVANTASDER-SENPAI!

8=======================================================================================================> BE THE SUPERFABULICIOUS CAJAFRAGILISTIC EXPEALIDOCIOUS RONAYDEXY-CHAN

RONAYDEXYLALOARYARLEY: ho yse yuo cna eb meeeeATFRE LALi ma d bst prsnEVR *flp hr*

[color=#000000]YOU GET THE HONOUR OF BEING THIS SO KAWAII-DESU GIRL AND SHE REALLY APPRECIATES IT BECAUSE SHE LIKES THAT YOU ACKNOWLEDGE HER KAWAII-DESU SUGOI-DESU POWERS OF MUSE OF PRETTINESS!

SUDDENLY, HER BLOOD COLOUR CHANGES AND SHE BECOMES:::::::

OHMIGOSHSUGOISAILORMOONRONAYDEXYLALOARYARLEYxxKIREIxxSUGEDESUxx: iiii maaa SU MEZNG RHT?!